Danny Phantom Online Community

[DannyPhangirl]

Lion King and Danny Phantom fanfic

The sun was shining on a beautiful morning in the Pridelands. King Simba and Queen Nala had their hearts lifted and were relieved all the evils were gone.

Kiara was so glad that her father let Kovu stay with them along with the rest of the former outlanders. They are "one" as Simba had put it when he was teaching Kiara
that they will always be together.
Simba was out doing his usual rounds at keeping the Pridelands safe and was on border patrol. Zazu was becoming an old majordomo and Kiara was about to have a newborn cub this new moon.

Nala was sleeping in the den and Kovu was asleep next to Kiara and Vitani. Rafiki was very old now and knew that sometime in the next full moon it would be his time to join the great king Mufasa's spirit and guide Kiara and the family. Rafiki was making a concoction now and was quite content... A soft wind then blew with leaves and feathers and Rafiki reached up and grapped one. He sniffed at it and gasped.

Rafiki my old friend... Scar is returning to the Pridelands. "Mufasa, what do you mean Scar is returning to da Pridelands?" The feather blew out of his hand and a leaf went into it. His spirit is coming and you need to find someone to help my son fight him...before you...join me.
"I see... My time is soon coming... But Mufasa, who will I find to help Simba and Nala?" You will know when the time is right my friend... Don't tell Simba yet, but tell the one you find, that a king needs help in defeating a great threat. "Yes Mufasa, I'll find this someone very soon!" Thank-you old friend... Then the wind picked up the feathers and leaves and blew them away. Rafiki used his juices and painted something that looked like an evil lion's spirit...Scar.

In Amity Park...
"Here dude,catch!" Tucker threw the thermos at Danny. "Thanks Tuck!" "Hey Skulker!" "Wha? AAH!!" The thermos sucked in Skulker like a vacuum.
Danny flew down to Tucker and Sam and changed back into his human form. "Come on guys let's go put him back in the ghost zone and then go walk around the neighborhood." Sam suggested. "Yeah, ok sure!" Danny said. They walked back to Fenton Works, Danny's house, and went down to the lab. No one was down there so they opened up the thermos and literally, Skulker was pulled into the whirling green portal and the door shut quickly. "Alright, let's go walk!" Tucker said. Even though I just want to use my PDA... So the three friends walked out of the house and started strolling around the neighborhood. They went into the woods of Amity Park and were walking along a narrow path. "Uh guys? I have to go!" Tucker shouted. "What? We just started walking!" Sam argued. "No Sam, I have to go!! You know...GO!" "Danny raised an eyebrow. "Uh, T-M-I Tucker!" "Well I really do!" "Then go behind that tree, we won't look!" The two friends turned around and Tucker walked behind the tree. Sam was thinking about Danny. Maybe this isn't the time...to tell him how I feel. Danny noticed her thoughtful expression. "Sam? Something bothering you?" Oh, what if he finds out? No, won't happen..he's totally clueless. Sam smiled slightly at her friend. "Danny, I just...nevermind."
"What?" Danny asked. "I just remembered I have to go!" Sam took off running past trees and rocks. Danny stood there, bewildered for a moment before relizing he should see what's wrong. "Sam, wait!" Danny was starting to run after her but tripped and fell into a deep hole lurking on the hard ground, and fell unconcious...

In the Pride Lands...
Rafiki had finished painting when he saw a a green and brown swirl -a cloud perhaps- open up in the sky. He saw a strange creature -with four limbs like Rafiki but no tail- fall right out of that swirling thing-that-looks-like-a-cloud and hit the ground. The almost-cloud was ten feet above the ground and it was swirling into dissapearence. Then it was gone. But the creature...was not. Rafiki climbed down his big tree and stepped cautiously toward this unknown living thing with his stick. Rafiki considered poking him with the stick but decided not to. Instead, he backed up about three feet away as he realized this creature was waking up and slowly getting to his feet.
"W- Where am I?" Rafiki could see he spoke his language, but how? "AHH A MONKEY!" The creature Rafiki couldn't recognize backed up slowly. "Wait! What are you?" Rafiki asked suspiciously."What?! You can speak my language?" This thing was fascinated by Rafiki and Rafiki began to smile. "I am Rafiki and I am too surprised we can talk to eachother. I am not a monkey by the way, I am a mandrill or a baboon. I am the shamen of the Pride lands." The creature was still dumbfounded he could talk to a mandrill.

"Uh well, I..uh... Nice to meet you. I'm Danny, but hey do you know how I got here?" "Well something like a cloud appeared in the sky and you fell out of it. I don't know what it was though. But are you going to anser my question? What are you?" Danny looked puzzled when Rafiki said 'cloud' and 'sky' and 'fell'. "Uh, I'm a human. Well actually, I'm two things... I'm half human and I'm half ghost. Or spirit, whatever you want to call it."
Rafiki looked surprised when Danny said 'spirit'. "Oh you are the one! You are the one to help my friend defeat an old enemy that has returned!" Danny looked deeply confused. Was this mandrill crazy? "Excuse me?" Danny asked. Rafiki repeated, "You! Listen, there is a great king -a lion- that rules over these lands and his uncle died many years ago...But his spirit has returned and the king's father is a spirit as well. The king's father, Great king Mufasa, has told me to find someone to stop Scar! That is the evil lion's name. You are half spirit so you can help! Mufasa told me to find someone to help king Simba! That is the name of our current king!"

Danny understood now, so a lion is in danger? His kindom in danger? This seemed all to weird for our heroic phantom fighter. But if he was fighting the ghost of a lion, it was all fine by him. It was a ghost... Right? "OK Rafiki...I'l help you." "Thank-you my friend! Come, I must introduce you to King Simba!" Danny followed the strange but wise baboon into the african savannah.

In Amity Park...
"What you guys?" Tucker couldn't hear their entire conversation, but he suddenly heard nothing. Had they left? He zipped up his pants and walked out from behind the tree to where Danny and sam were standing. Sam turned around to face her friend. She stopped running after Danny told her to wait. I'm so stupid to run! That won't solve this... But she only found a confused Tucker looking at her.
"Hey Tuck!! Did you see where Danny went?" Sam called loudly. "No, but why are you over there?" Sam shook her head ran back to Tucker but saw the hole and ran around it. "I almost told him how I felt..." Tucker nodded and spoke. "Sam, you need to tell him. You won't feel better until you get it off your chest."
Sam sighed. "Danny was just here right? Where is he?" Tucker asked worriedly. "Oh-no...He must have fell in that hole!" Sam ran back to the hole and looked down. It wasn't very deep... "No he isn't there..." Tucker said. "Danny?" Sam asked. No reply. "DANNY?!" Tucker and Sam both shouted, not in the hole, but all around them. "Oh no, what if a ghost has him?" "Well wouldn't we have heard him?" Tucker replied. The two friends saw no trace of Danny.

It was getting late and Sam and Tucker knew they had to go home. "Call him!" Tucker took out his cell and dialed Danny's number. It went straight to his voicemail. "His phone's off." Sam shook her head. "Well maybe he already went home." Tucker said, trying to make them both feel better. "Yeah, you're probably right." So Tucker and Sam went home that evening a little relaxed and hopefully, They would see Danny at school the next morning....If not?

[docarrol]

Since you asked for feedback in the Shout Box...

First (and this absolutely does not reflect on your writing), I know some people like crossovers and fusions, but I generally avoid them. Especially when the original sources are so far apart in style and content. That's one reason I didn't offer a review before this, and why I'm not really going to comment much on the story itself.

Second, in looking over your story, I did notice a few things you might want to fix or avoid in the future.

There were a few spelling errors. "Conkoction" isn't spelled with a 'k', "Pridelands" and "majordomo" are each two words, etc., and there were a couple of grammatical nitpicks. Nothing too serious, but you should probably re-read anything you plan to post publicly, and run it through a spelling and grammar checker.

You should probably break your paragraphs in to shorter segments, especially between one person speaking and the next.

You might want to consider finding some way of marking off when a spirit is silently communicating, or when someone is thinking. Since they're not actually speaking, you don't need to use quote marks confusing, but I found the complete lack of differentiation a little confusing.

Behind a tree? Really? He couldn't have gone before they left, or held it a few minutes longer to get back to somewhere with a public restroom? Or at least look long enough for one before deciding he couldn't wait any longer?
Oh well, at least they were out in the woods, and not, say, the public park. Less chance of someone walking up accidentally. I guess that's not entirely unfair, and kinda fits with the bathroom humor the show sometimes showcased, but Tucker totally deserves to get razzed for that later.

Does Sam have arachnophobia? I don't remember her having a problem with spiders, and I know she has a spider shaped backpack, but I suppose I could have forgotten something. It just seems like an awfully small thing for Sam to get panicked over after a couple years of going toe to toe with ghosts, monsters, Vlad, etc. And as a goth and some one who in many ways deliberately rejects stereotypically "girly" things and attitudes, spiders seem like something she'd either be in to, or indifferent to.
... On the other hand, if you're referencing something specific from the show, then kudos to you for the nod to continuity, and I guess I'll have to rewatch whatever episode that came from.

That was an oddly specific description of the hole. Unless the actual dimensions of the hole are important for the story, you probably don't need to provide specific numbers, just note that it was big and deep.

If their assumption was that Danny had suddenly left to go somewhere else without letting them know, why didn't they try calling his cell phone. If Danny doesn't carry one, or happened not to have it that day, or it was dead, or just failed to answer, then Sam and Tucker could have called or walked to his house, and asked his parents or Jazz if they knew anything.

One of the people who actually writes could probably advise you better on this point, but you seem to be telling your read about what's happening more than showing that something is happening, or allowing the narrative to flow. I've been told that this is something a lot of inexperienced writers struggle with (and I know it's something I've seen in my own writing).

The dialog wasn't bad, but I think it could use some more polish, too.

Over all, I think it's a decent effort, and you, like all the authors and artists here, are to be commended for contributing, and respected for the creative talents and courage to post your work publicly.

docarrol

[DannyPhangirl]

In the Pride Lands...

Simba was already back at Priderock. He approached a sleeping Zazu. He nudged him with his paw. Zazu woke up and looked to a mighty lion standing before him.

"S-Sire?" He asked sluggishly, and rubbed his eyes with his long spread-out wings.

"I need you to fly over head, for the evening report."

Zazu nodded to his king eagerly and set to the skies. Hmm..the zebras are sharing the water with other animals...good, good...The hippopotomus' aren't bullying anyone...and- What's this?

He spotted a mandrill and some other creature heading towards Pride rock. He flew down to Rafiki and the creature. He landed in front of them gracefully. Danny grinded his teeth. Could this one talk too?

"Rafiki, who is this and why are you taking him to King Simba's lands?" Zazu asked politely. Rafiki shook his stick in the air. "Mufasa sent him from another distant land to help us cope with a problem..." He answered. Zazu flew above their heads. "Come, I'll escort you both." He said and flew off. Rafiki and Danny followed, Danny was still confused but kept up with the mandrill and bird.

As they approached Pride Rock, Danny felt a little intimidated by its size. He walked up the round rocks that lead towards the top. Rafiki put his hand out to Danny's chest

to stop him. "Wait, I will get the king." He moved his stick in front of him and walked close to the cave.

Simba smiled, as he saw a two-legged figure come close to him.

"Hello Rafiki." He noticed the mandrill's serious look. "What is it?" Simba asked, his tone being stern.

"There is someone you must meet." He looked behind him to see Zazu standing, his wings on the side of his small, blue body. "Bring him in."

Zazu nodded and held up his wing to the den. Danny cautiously stepped forward, now

standing in front of the large cave. Simba's eyes were confused and stepped close to the creature. "Rafiki, explain."

He held his stick tight in his hand and spoke, "Mufasa, your father, has told me to find one who will help you. What help is needed and why? I cannot tell but Danny here can tell you." He moved his stick in front of the creature.

"He is a human. Walks on only two, as I do, but isn't from around here." Simba turned his head to Danny. Danny stood nervously, was the king judging him?

"What is your name?" Simba asked, only knowing he has never before seen the Pride Lands. "Danny." He answered simply. He didn't want to answer something to long.

Did this lion welcome him here? Simba smiled in response. "I am King Simba." He walked over to a resting Nala and nudged her. "Simba..." She said softly and smiled.

"I need you to meet Danny." Nala looked confused, and stretched tiredly. She walked over to the human. "I am Queen Nala. I here you are Danny?" He nodded shyly and looked at Rafiki and back at the queen. "Glad to meet you." She said and looked at her mate. Simba spoke, "You may sleep now." They nuzzled and Nala went back to her resting spot. "You may sleep here tonight." Simba declared, facing Danny. Zazu approached the king. "All is well with the evening report." He said proudly.

Simba nodded and strolled over to Nala and layed by her side. He closed his eyes.

Danny sat down on the cold rock floor and watched the sunset from the mouth of the cave. Rafiki walked down Pride Rock and headed towards his home, in the great tree. Zazu walked in front of the human. "Sleep well Daniel." He said in his regal accent. He curled up, looking like a blue ball of feathers and slept.

Danny watched the red-orange sun disappear below the horizon. He yawned and layed his head against a rock. He slept a few minutes later, dreaming of he and his friends walking through the woods earlier that day.

[DannyPhangirl]

In the Amity Park...

"Tucker! Listen, I've tried calling him like six times already! He's not answering!" Sam yelled at Tucker in Casper High's school hallway.
"But I don't want to spend all my time after school searching for him! He's fine! And besides, he doesn't have his phone, his dad does."
"Well how do you know he's OK? For all we know, one of his enemies could have captured him and he could be in major trouble!" She argued.
Tucker sighed in defeat. "Alright, alright..." The bell rang, notifying the school day was over,
and the two friends dashed out of Casper High and off to Danny's house. When they arrived, Jazz was home early, doing her homework. "Hey have you guys seen-"
"We're gunna find Danny, 'cause he's missing!" Tucker shouted as he climbed up the stairs.
Jazz rolled her eyes. "I know he's missing, Our mom, dad and I have already noticed and are worried. If you'd let me finish, I'm wondering if-"
"No time Jazz, life-or-death situation here!" Sam said as she followed Tucker. Jazz gave up and continued writing.
Danny's bedroom door swung open, as Tucker and Sam bolted through. Sam dug through a dressor, and some drawers. "What are we looking for?" Tucker asked pulling out his PDA. "The thermos, the Fenton phones, and the spector deflectors...Just in case." Sam said huriedly. "Why would they be in Danny's room? Wouldn't they be in the lab?" Tucker questioned. "Danny always keeps a spare of each. And Jazz would be suspicious if we barged right into the basement." She finally found the items, and handed one of each to Tucker. They put on the Fenton phones, the spector deflectors, and they strapped the thermos' around their backs.
"Wait a minute-Wouldn't Jazz be suspicious if we ran out of the house like this?"
"Yeah, but we're going out the window." Sam replied. "Oh...wait-THE WINDOW??" Tucker suddenly asked, surprised. "Shh! Jazz, remember?"
She yanked the covers and bed sheets off the mattress, and tied them together. She held one end, and threw the other end out the window. "Come on." Tucker sighed, and followed her out the window. They landed on their feet, and left the rope hanging. "We should check by the old Amity Park warehouse first." Tucker suggested, remebering Danny fight the lunch lady ghost, Skulker and Technus. "Yeah." Sam agreed and the two of them ran off.